The Funhouse (1981)

Why is it that the things that are supposed to fill us with joy have this weird filmic flipside of death and horror? Carnivals, clowns, ventriloquist dummies, holidays, magicians, sex, drugs, James Corden; they may all sound fun but trust me kids, they're not!

I'd love to see a British take on a funfair horror film with aging, greasy-quiffed Teds, fags dangling from their lower lips taking on tramp-stamped and Hilfiger-clad staffie walkers with crooked air-rifles and hook-a-duck poles while a distorted and stretched 30-year-old 'Now That's What I Call Music' tape plays over the PA. Starring David Essex, Alvin Stardust and Phil Daniels. Ringo Starr would die first.

10 out of 10 for the carnies, production design and puppets but the rest is pretty average and the monster is a bit shit.

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