Housebound (2014)

Well, that was unexpectedly good! I'll never look at a cheese grater in the same way again.

Letterboxd Review

Red Hill (2010)

A very good Aussie-neo-western staring Home & Away star done good, Ryan Kwanten as deputy Shane Cooper.

Letterboxd Review

The Hunter (2011)

Not as good as seeing Fatso falling off the kitchen counter (old-time Aussie soap fans may get that reference) but I'll take any film that contains wombats! Dafoe moves way too quickly and lacks patience (it's like they wanted to portray hunting accurately but were afraid to commit to the stillness needed) and you never leave a wood-burner door open when you sleep at night - shut the door to stop embers hitting rugs and causing a fire. It also reduces the amount of air feeding the flames which prolong the burn time, hopefully until morning. The last 30 minutes were silly, but... wombats!

Shit, that was almost a review. Stop it Andrew, stop it!

Letterboxd Review

Mad Max: Fury Road (2015)

A tale of emancipation and the death of religion.

A near perfect blend of practical and CGI effects, senseless violence and subtext, artiface and reality, the big spectical and the internal dialogue.

The Handmaid's Tale for the 21st century.

---

Immortan Joe,
V8 be your name.
No water come,
your law will be done,
on the road, as it is in Valhalla.
Give us this day our gasoline,
and forgive our weakness,
as we suck a new blood bag.
And let us not die soft,
but go out with our grills chromed.
Forever and ever mate.

— The Warboy's Prayer

---

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

— Ephesians 5:22-33

---

Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection.

But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.

For Adam was first formed, then Eve.

And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.

Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.

— Timothy 2:11-15

---

"Abandonment of slavery is also the banishment of the chimera of security. The world will not change overnight, and liberation will not happen unless individual women agree to be outcasts, eccentrics, perverts, and whatever the powers-that-be choose to call them."

— Germaine Greer, "The Female Eunuch"

---

"This view that women are somehow inferior to men is not restricted to one religion or belief. Women are prevented from playing a full and equal role in many faiths. Nor, tragically, does its influence stop at the walls of the church, mosque, synagogue or temple. This discrimination, unjustifiably attributed to a Higher Authority, has provided a reason or excuse for the deprivation of women's equal rights across the world for centuries. At its most repugnant, the belief that women must be subjugated to the wishes of men excuses slavery, violence, forced prostitution, genital mutilation and national laws that omit rape as a crime. But it also costs many millions of girls and women control over their own bodies and lives, and continues to deny them fair access to education, health, employment and influence within their own communities.... The truth is that male religious leaders have had -- and still have -- an option to interpret holy teachings either to exalt or subjugate women. They have, for their own selfish ends, overwhelmingly chosen the latter."

— Jimmy Carter, "Losing My Religion for Equality"

---

"I am one of the Vuvalini! Of the many mothers! My Initiating Mother was K.T. Concannon! I am the daughter of Mary Jabassa. My clan was Swaddle Dog!"

— (no longer) Imperator Furiosa

Letterboxed Review

Kokoda (2006)

March Around The World 2015 Challenge - Australia

"Wallamaloo, you stupid bastard!"

In 1942 a battalion of poorly trained and ill equipped, conscripted Australian soldiers (named Chocos, as they were expected to melt under the heat of battle) were left to hold against the advancing Japanese army on the Kokoda trail in New Guinea. This is the story of one platoon's desperate fight to survive.

Rather ridiculously, Australia seems to be a forgotten force in WWII as far as the rest of the world is concerned and it's good to see a film about the large contribution that they made in the Pacific. What is a shame however is that the film sank without a trace and there are only three reviews on letterboxd - so let's sort that out, eh?.

A decent war film full of small acts of heroism, cowardice, terror, brutality, sweat, overheating Bren guns, moments of peace, comradeship, ultra-cool uniforms, stubbornness, sudden death, dirt, rain, hats, and above all the will to survive. The pacing is a little slow at times but it's well shot with tight, claustrophobic camera-work, good performances and a very nice sound design. Kokoda is a film that deserves way more exposure than it got.

"Courage Endurance Mateship Sacrifice"

Original letterboxd review

The Babadook (2014)

WARNING: spoilers of a sort ahead...

The Babadook is superficially a paranormal horror flick but delve just beneath the surface and we find a story about a woman with severe, untreated, post-natal depression caused by the guilt of her husbands death whilst driving her to the maternity ward. The death of the husband/fat
her creates issues for both the mother (sleep deprivation, hallucinations and paranoia) and with the son, who is fiercely protective of his mother and has a distinct lack of boundaries.

The performances of the two leads are terrific, especially Essie Davis's transformation from a caring, if sometimes over-protective mother, to a woman desperately in need of help, and finally into a monster intent on destroying, what she perceives to be, the cause of her husband's death. The main set of an old house complete with creaky floorboards, black and grey walls, flickering lights and antique furniture brings to mind haunted house / psychological horror films such as The Innocents, The Haunting and Gaslight. Added to this is sound design that further accentuates the Mothers descent into depression and paranoia.

A classy, tension filled horror film and a nail in the coffin of the shitty jump-scare movies of recent years.

Original letterboxd review

The Rover (2014)

Guy Pearce plays Eric, a man haunted by his past and in search of his stolen car. Aided by the wounded brother of one of the thieves, they cross a near-future, Australian wasteland, leaving destruction in their wake.

The Rover is the spiritual successor to Mad Max, although the premise also reminds me of Point Blank. A protagonist with a single focus, willing to kill anyone who gets in the way of achieving his objective. The Japanese have a term, giri, that denotes the obligation of one person to another. The Rover is all about giri and this works in both directions; Pattinson's duty to the person who saved his life and Pearce's adoption of Pattinson.

Beautifully shot and composed. The film has a yellow hue and a wide aspect ratio that captures the desolate outback perfectly. Then there's the soundtrack, and what a soundtrack. A minimalist, post-rock masterpiece that sounds like telegraph cables vibrating in a hot desert wind. Perfect.

Pearce, complete with thousand yard stare, looks as crusty as an old croc and as pissed off as a snake in a clothes mangle. He's the fifth horseman of the apocalypse and he rides a dusty black ute. Pattinson's no slouch either and carries off his "Lenny" like character perfectly.

Grim.

"How the hell are you going to get to where you're going if you don't know where the fuck you are?"

Original letterboxd review

Turkey Shoot (1982)

The world goes to hell in a hand basket, and then...

Malcontents in a futuristic (in the cheapest possible way) totalitarian society are sent to a detainment camp for re-education where they're beaten, whipped, humiliated and, ultimately, hunted for sport a la The Most Dangerous Game. To be honest, the hunters are so incompetent we're just waiting for them to be killed by the equally incompetent prey. While all this is going on we can play a game of spot the B grade actors: we've got Noel "Mouth Full o' Plums" Ferrier. Roger "Mad Max" Ward, Olivia "Mmmm" Hussey, Steve "Crusher" Rackman, Steve "Fucking" Railsback and loads more. A veritable who's who of Mad Max, Harlequin and Crocodile Dundee!

The acting is passable, the dialogue is okay, the effects are fine, and there lies the problem. It's not good enough to be good and not bad enough to be good. It's just sort of in the middle and that's somewhere a B movie should never be. It does have it's moments though, usually involving Alph the wolfman who has a taste for toes.

Decent Ozploitation but not cheesy or bad enough to be a great one.

David Hemmings (Blowup, Barbarella, Deep Red) was executive producer! Why?

Original letterboxd review

Demons in My Head (2000)

I knew I was in for a treat as a grand total of three people on letterboxd have seen this and only one of them gave it a rating. The movie starts with the credits and someone called David Vallon has the role of "the wisest man in the universe". Now that's a lot for Dave to live up to, let's hope he's up to the job.

This was such an insane film that I thought I'd try and cover the entire plot in my review, so if you're thinking of watching this quite mental, c-grade, Aussie horror flick turn away now.

Meteorite falls from the sky into the back yard of a couple of "dudes" who look like they dressed in a charity shop during a powercut. Heavy repo "jocks" appear at the door and then leave for no reason. The third and female houemate appears. Dude1 loves dudette but this is not reciprocated. Dude1 gets covered in shit. The plaster of paris Meteorite is dug up and attacked with a hammer and chisel. Weird religious couple appear. Inside the meteorite is a device that looks like a headset. Exposition ensues. Dude1 flirts with religious lady. Ancient writings of the nephilm. Apparently it is thought the nephilm built the pyramids, so fuck you Egypt and your slaves. Boobage. Weird uncomfortable threesome sex scene between the dudes and a call-girl called Pamela. Dude2 tells dude 1 that he loves him. Dude1 finally put the headset on and gets fast cut visions. Sex scene of a Dudette humping a bloke's chest. So Dude1 loves Dudette, Dude2 loves Dude1, dudette loves humping men's torsos. Dude1 gets caught peeping at dudette and bloke chest humping. The headset goes on Dude1 and stay on through the night. Still no wise man. Religious couple join them for breakfast. Cheap special effects and Dude1 materialises some strawberry milk, a spiny fruit and a wooden idol. Why? Religious lady tries to convert Dude1 again. More flirting. More materialisation and a bottle of pop and a blue banana appear. And now some knackered money. Dude2 put the headset on. More visions, this time of a man with jam on his face vomiting milk. Circular saw! Yay, action. No, the vision ends with no blood shed. Extra-dimensional exposition. Lovers tiff between Dude1 and 2. Block of green metal materialises and a book vanishes. Book reappears. Dude1 makes tries to materialise a woman from a poster on his bedroom wall but instead a sexy grey lady appears - a nephilm I guess. Nephilm dribbles blood down her tits and says she wants to get it on. Dude1 refuses and sexy grey lady vanishes. Unsexy bearded old man appears and names the headset as a Nephilistic Dimensional Exelerator! Aha! Old man warns of the dangers of using the NDE and vanishes. Dude1 tries to materialise poster girl again, says "Oh no!" and fadeout. The religious nutters knock at the door and a really bad "possessed" voice tells them to "go away". They go in anyway. It's the jam faced, milk dribbling bloke! They get milk spat on them and pass out. They wake up in their underwear with Jammy man licking and nibbling them. Jammy tunes a radio into some death metal. Dude1 manages to get the NDE on his head and stops jammy man just as he was about to have fun with a powerdrill. Jammy man gets drilled and disappears. Dude1 makes dudette's boyfriend (he of the humpable chest) disappear. Dude1 now seems to have a throne of skulls and candles - what the fuck? Still no wise man. Beardy bloke is back, Wait a minute! Is he? Could he be? Is beardy man the wisest man in the universe? Oh, he's gone again. Jammy man and the torso dude are back. Jammy man tears a rubber arm off religious man and then nibbles him. Pig intestines! Dude1 looks pretty poorly by now. Religious lady tries to banish jammy man (maybe a slice of toast would work). Dude1 expels Jammy man again. Religious man tries to stuff pig intestines back into his stomach. Dude1 is now bleeding from his eyes. Dudette and torso leave the house. For no reason Dude1 now has a sexy lady dream. Dude1 is now most definitely possessed as he has purple lines drawn on his face and is looking frowny. Dude2 files his nails! Theological discussion between possessed Dude1 and religious lady. Dude1 wants her to be his whore of babylon! Dude2 snatches the NDE from Dude1's head. Screaming. Jammy man's back. Dude2 puts the NDE on his own head. Religious lady stabs jammy man with a very small nail file. A Jammy woman appears and Dude1 vanishes and reappears in a foggy field. Beardy man's back again. Yes! He actually says he's the wisest man in the universe! His advice? "Stop using the headset". Dimensional exposition. Beardy man sends Dude1 back home (he's like a beardy wizard of oz), but not before explaining that the jammy ones don't like bicarb of soda and brass. I like beardy man.Dude1 grabs a tub of bicarb and throws it on a jammy man. Oh, I think jammy woman is a long haired jammy man. Religious lady stabs jammy man/woman with the nail file... lots and lots. Bad video effect. Religious lady puts a NDE on herself! Why? Possessed religious lady. Jammy man/woman worships possessed religious lady and disappears. Dude2 comforts and strokes Dude1. Possessed religious lady talks to beardy man and makes a metal skull and lots of money appear. Poster girl appears! No, Dude2 has been turned into poster girl! Dude1 and Dude2/poster girl get it on until he/she gets all skanky and burny. The end. What the fuck?

At least it wasn't boring. I quite liked it.

Original letterboxd review

Wake in Fright (1971)

I've been thinking of how to review this and I think Todd Gaines has the right idea - stream of consciousness. So here goes (and much thanks to Todd).

Heat, flies, resignation, dream, hope, yellow, schooners, escape, dust, decay, stains, sweat, mining, beer, intimidation, indignation, isolation, greed, gambling, threats, lust, vomit, fever, fear, fried, trapped, distress, money, gambling, beer, roo, stubbies, lamping, barbarity, orgiastic, cruelty, masculinity, suffering, regret, pressure, ugliness, rage, violence, disgust, escape, survival, devolution, anger, hope, despair, madness, escape, release, sorrow, rebirth, escape, return.

I used to take a train home at the weekend at the same time as the oil riggers after 2 weeks of hard graft. One rigger told me the story of how it once took two weeks to get home after stopping at every station, getting shit-faced, sleeping rough and then catching the train the next day. As soon as he got home it was time to catch the train back and start work again.

A fantastic film examining masculinity - for example it has a great wrestling moment with Donald Pleasence that, I'm sure, takes the piss out of the equivalent scene with Oliver Reed (the contemporary portrait of masculinity) in Women in Love.

Final though: "Withnail & I" has been usurped: the dialogue is the dog's bollocks and eminently quotable.

"All the little devils are proud of hell"

Original letterboxd review

Mad Max (1979)

Take note Tarantino; this is a grindhouse classic. A near perfect action film with great editing, cinematography and dialogue. The 2.35:1 ratio is perfect for the Australian outback and the wide, straight roads. This and the zoom shots of eyes nod to Sergio Leone's spaghetti westerns - in fact Mad Max is very much an Aussie western. Crows cawing precede each action sequence apart from the finale in which a bird of prey appears just as Max seeks revenge. Please watch this film with the original Australian soundtrack as the colloquialisms are fantastic - any film with a kid called sprog is all right in my book.

"They say people don't believe in heroes anymore. Well, damn them! You and me, Max, we're gonna give 'em back their heroes!"

Original letterboxd review

Bad Boy Bubby (1993)

I honestly didn't think I could last the length of the film as the beginning was so depressing and sad. I don't think I've seen a film that affected me as much as Bad Boy Bubby. All characters were wonderfully rounded, the cinematography was, on occasion great, the soundtrack (especially the ambient sounds at the beginning) was one of the best I've heard. Send the kids to bed and get the hankies out.

Original letterboxd review